1 week post op: Where Did All This Energy Come From?

I have been waking up around 6 every morning. Which isn't out of the ordinary since I am usually at work by 6 lol. Yesterday I swept and mopped the living room. Today I got up, did all the dishes, cleaned the entire kitchen. Made my son grilled cheese sandwich and soup for lunch.  So not trying to overdue anything. I am sitting down now having some blended homemade soup my Russian friends mother made for me.  I'm just really enjoying this.  Before surgery on my days off it be out of bed and onto the couch.  With no energy or motivation to do anything. It's too icy out to be walking so I guess house cleaning is my way of getting in some exercise. I go tomorrow to my doctor for my one week post op appointment.  Hope he see's that everything is alright. I would hate that feeling this great would be overshadowed by a complication or anything. Happy thought, happy thoughts.

Out Of The House

So my ex husband thought maybe it would be a good idea to get out of the house.  I have been feeling so well I thought sure. Took a shower put on some makeup and out we went. Ironically enough we went to dinner with some friends of his. It wasn't hard at all. I had a bowl of chicken noodle soup, (actually I just had them skim the top and I was careful not to swallow any hard bits of veggies or chicken. And he ordered me one scrambled egg. It was weird to me after a little bit of broth and three WELL CHEWED bites of egg I was full.
Then we went to Walmart to get a few things that I needed for the house. Started getting a little tired so when we were done there we dropped off a birthday card to our friend and headed home. I have to say the only uncomfortable thing about the evening was the driving. Missoula roads are well, less than kept up.
I slept pretty good last night, although I do still wake up when I need to move or change positions. But I find that if I keep a pillow on either side of me so no matter what side I turned I have something to hug against me I sleep good.

I have noticed some bruising now around most of the incision sites. Mainly on the sides and right above my belly button. The one at the very top hasn't bruised at all yet. I'm thinking that may have been just a camera because it's the smallest incision.  I feel a twinge here and there in my abdomen but nothing excruciating.  I have my post op next Tuesday with the surgeon so we'll see how it's going.

4 Days Post Op

Well hello there everyone. I'm happy to say that I made it thru surgery...lol  Yes I am a bit of a worry wart. Getting ready for surgery was a bit more of a pain in the ass then anything.  Took them over an hour before they got an IV started. I almost didn't have time to see my family before I went in. They stuck me 7 times, they were just about to just put one in my NECK, then the doctor came in again and got one started in my hand.
Surgery was Monday, that night in the hospital I was pretty sore. The only thing that escalated it was them emptying my JP drain and resetting it to draw again.  It felt like they it had a hold of my lung or something. Intensive care nurse came to check on me once to rule out a clot for the pain.
Tuesday morning I had my swallow test and passed with flying colors. So when they got me back to my room I got all the tubes and drains removed. I was free. They kept the IV attachment in my hand just in case. I went walking Monday night and a few times Tuesday. By 3 o clock Tuesday I was resting at home on my couch.
I have a great support system here. Friends were with me all night and have been in and out everyday that I've been home. I was in and out of it Tuesday night. Wed was a pretty good day, Thursday was a rough one. Not sure why I woke up feeling like poo. Started feeling better by that afternoon.
Today even with my friend here I got up by myself, fixed my shake, fixed my soup. Haven't had any pain meds today.
I am tolerating water, the shakes, the puree'd soups really well. Just getting use to the constant burping. lol All in all I think I am doing pretty well and having a great experience so far.
Although I haven't lost any weight yet.  I talked to my nurse about that today and she said it was because of all the fluids that were given to me in the hospital and the gas they pumped me up with, she said that usually after about the first week after surery is when the weight loss starts. And that I'll be surprised.

Reality Just Hit

So here I am sititng at home enjoying my dinner of chicken broth and the phone rings. It's my surgeon!   He was just calling to make sure that I am ready  for Monday and to discuss me changing my mind from my lap band to the bypass. I gave him my reasons which he all said were good reasons.  But he wanted to let me know that there were bigger risks and talked about death. But that no matter what surgery I had he believed that I was making the right choice.

I knew he was just doing his job informing me, but something snapped and I went to the background and cried for an hour. I almost called him back and cancelled. The fear of the surgery has been overshadowing everything else for the last few days. I am so scared of death, I have been since I was a little girl. But now that I am a mother and have two beautful kids that need me I'm even more scared.  But this is a pretty common surgery these days.  And both my surgeons are wonderful, in this Bariatric Center for bypass both partners are in on the surgery.  Dr Swannack is also a vascular surgeon so I feel that I am in good hands. And he also let me know that he only works with the anesthesiologists that are use to taking care of people my size.
Some of my friends haven't helped with the panic, telling me they are scared for me. That they had a dream about me and woke up crying. NOT the words of encouragement that someone needs to hear 5 days before major surgery.  I have to believe that I am going to be okay. I know there are no guarantees and it's okay to be scared. I heard that this brings life changes so I am started by removing the naysayers and their opinions.  Is this going to be hard, you bet your ass it is. But I am ready to be healthier. They'll just have to give me an extra shot of the "I don't give a damn juice" before they take me in...lol

Feeling the Growl

Wow, I have been on the liquid diet for 5 days now. OMG this is a true test of my will power. I am hoping that this is just the worst of it and if I push past this I can make it til the 10th.  Water, sugar free jello, sugar free pops and chicken broth.  I did try the beef broth from Swansons, it was gross. Chicken broth will be my best friend. lol  But I did find myself in tears last night because I was so hungry for real food.
      I have thought more than once if I was doing the right thing.  I know I am, just a little time being uncomfortable for a longer healthier life.  New years eve I was very proud of myself. All of my friends drinking and eating, and me with my water bottle..lol  I did have a blast and it was great to wake up the next day without a hangover or feeling like I got hit by a Mack Truck.
     I got all registered on the 30th. Had a chest xray, ekg and blood work all done. I am suppose to check in at 7 and surgery is at 830am.  The panic attacks have set in. I don't worry about the pain or the recovery, just as long as wake up to go through it. My biggest fear is the anesthesia.  But I have been under 5 times twice as heavy as I am now. But there is still that fear.
     Well the kids have ordered pizza for dinner so I am off to head to my friends house to be away from the temptation.

So I went to the doctors yesterday and was officially put on the schedule for January 10th, I check in at 6am.  The nerves have hit. I am trying to focus on what it will be like after all is said and done and less on the actual surgery itself. But I am scared, nervous and excited all wrapped into one.
I am working a lot of overtime at work to get all my bills paid up a few months ahead of time.  I haven't put too much thought into my hospital bag or even my contact list. I do know my father, my best friend and my ex husband are all going to be there when I go in and will there when I get out. 
I still have to have my ekg and chest x-ray done.  I meet again with my nurse for my teaching on the 30th and on New Years Eve I start my 10 day liquid fast or "liver shrink".  I am going out shopping over the next few weeks to stock up on low sodium broth, fat free jello and anything else that I can have on the liquid diet. All suggestions are more than welcome!
I have all the leave approved from my work. So I think for now I just sit back and stick with my two protien shakes a day and a healthy dinner.